She hadn't been fully asleep, she couldn't be with John in the state he's been in. She can sense it now, the moment when the dreams start. The way his breathing changes, the tiny sounds he makes, and they keep her sleeping lightly because she knows what could come next. It's all so painfully familiar to her she feels like she's living time backwards somehow. Like she's managed to drag John into her world instead of finding a new one with him. She hates every second of it. Hates what it's doing to him. To them.

The blow is unexpected, as sharp and sudden as it is. Certainly not the first time she's been left battered by someone else's nightmares but the pain is intense and immediate and she's backing away before she even has time to think. A hand to her face and the other held up to guard against anything else that could happen.

"SHIT. John. John are you awake? Wake up now!"